Way to be intentional and self-reflective. If meditation isn’t a regular part of your practice, I recommend it as a way to check in and make peace with your body as it is, grateful for what it has provided for you (life, breath, health, passion…) and grateful for what it has carried for you (stress, shame, fear…) and as you develop a stronger relationship with your body, ask “it” (yourself) what it needs to be able to release old things (nutrition, sleep, movement, weight-training, therapy). Good luck in the journey, my friend. You’re stronger than you think you are.
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